rustle | exo: what if this storm ends? (2/3)

Kyungsoo collapses on the couch as soon as he gets home, wiggling his toes before tucking them beneath the pillows on the other end. He can still feel the ache in his calves and feet, the long hours of walking and keeping up with Soohyun's pace taking its toll on him. "She gets extra hyper in the evening," he remembers Baekhyun saying. "Just like her appa!" Baekhyun had continued, grinning, and leaned closer to Kyungsoo to nuzzle Soohyun's nose, his palm warm and secure on Kyungsoo's arm.

Baekhyun had stopped to give him a look before pulling away then, hand dropping to his side. Hours after and Kyungsoo can still feel the warmth of Baekhyun's touch, the pressure of five fingers wound around his arm. Baekhyun leaves marks on everything he touches — Kyungsoo just happened to be at the right place and the right time.

He feels the light buzz of his phone in his pocket, and he groans as he turns over and reaches inside to fish for it. Two messages, both from Baekhyun, the first one being a moving sticker of a kid sending a heart across the screen, and the second being a message punctuated by an emoticon. thank u for helping appa find clothes for me, kyungsoo-oppaaaa~ next time pick out a white dress for me? chuu~ ( ˘ ³˘)♥, it reads, and Kyungsoo turns around again, lying flat on his stomach, the smile on his lips pressed against the soft cushion on his couch.

anytime, soohyunnie~ (・∇・)❤ he types after a while, then lays his phone face down on the table when he gets up, heading to his room for a quick shower.

He catches the sound of his phone beeping thrice when he returns from his bath. Some of the fatigue from the time he'd spent with Baekhyun and Soohyun have already gone down the drain along with the warm water that makes the autumn chill much more tolerable, and he feels the tension in his muscles ease a little. He stretches his legs in front of him, pulls a pillow close, then sinks in the couch before going through each notification — messages from Baekhyun, and his phone telling him that it needs to be charged.

that's not u (' ㅅ ')
(⊙♡⊙) ← this is u kekeke
good night, do kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo chuckles, shaking his head as he changes the chat name from byun baekhyun to (' ㅅ '). He exits the application even before his fingers could type a response, and begins to go through his emails, smiling as the goes through each and every single message with Baekhyun's emoticons still at the back of his mind.

☁

October ushers in colder weather, stronger winds and rains beating down the streets of Seoul in the afternoon. Kyungsoo draws the folds of his jacket closer to his chest, shivering when the cool wind wraps around his fists, and Baekhyun only laughs at him. His laughter is shaky, teeth chattering, and Baekhyun bumps his hip into Kyungsoo's when Kyungsoo cackles.

"Now I'm less worried about leaving Soohyun with Chanyeol," Baekhyun says. "This kind of cold's not good for her."

He remembers the time when they walked along the streets of Cheongdam-dong from COEX one evening, and Soohyun had wheezed practically half the time, the long, leisurely walk turning into some of the most heart-thumping minutes of Baekhyun's life. It took a while to soothe the coughing, and no amount of back rubs and layers of blankets could effectively make Soohyun's cough subside. "My apartment's just around the block," Kyungsoo remembers himself saying, and the lines of tension on Baekhyun's forehead eased and a small smile tugged up on the corners of his lips.

So he asks now, "Byun Baekhyun, worried?", because he's positive that he's crossed the line between acquaintance and friend, and because Baekhyun has circled an arm around Kyungsoo's, hands cold even through the cardigan that Kyungsoo is wearing.

Baekhyun doesn't answer for a while, simply pulls Kyungsoo along with him as they pick up pace and turn a corner. The convenience store is up ahead, just a few blocks away, but blocks have always been a bit wider in Seoul than in most places. "I've got pimples on my nose and cheeks. I'm hella worried," Baekhyun finally replies. "See, that's the thing when you graduate from 'reckless working class guy' to 'dad' — you start to worry about every single thing! What your kid's going to eat, if she's with good company, if she isn't wheezing or—"

Baekhyun worrying his lip as he smoothes out the creases on Soohyun's shirt, Baekhyun rubbing Soohyun's back at the beginning of a cough, Baekhyun's hands rummaging through the pink duffel bag deftly as soon as he finds out it's time for Soohyun to drink milk. The twisting pain in Kyungsoo's stomach when Soohyun starts to cry and Baekhyun takes deep breaths to mask the panic in his system. "Clearly not about who you're about to bump into," Kyungsoo retorts, grabbing Baekhyun by the collar. "You better look out for yourself."

Baekhyun laughs a little. "Well, I haven't done much of that in the past. I should start working on that more," he says, voice almost dropping to a whisper. "It feels a little weird to have someone watch your back all the time, after all, expecting you to fuck up."

"In my defense, I thought you actually had your eyes on the road."

"I did, for a moment," Baekhyun replies, chuckling. Baekhyun slips an arm around Kyungsoo's waist this time, settling just above the hip, and Kyungsoo takes a deep breath when he feels the sudden stripe of warmth spread across his back. He can feel the wrath of the cold winds of autumn beating down his neck, running shivers down his spine. Baekhyun is tapping his fingers lightly on Kyungsoo's waist. "And then I got distracted."

A few steps forward, and Baekhyun still hasn't loosened his hold on him. Kyungsoo gulps hard. "You would be the type," he begins, wincing a little when he hears the sudden lilt of his voice. "To get easily distracted."

"Only by the interesting things," Baekhyun whispers in his ear, then pulls away after a heartbeat. He does a pirouette, stopping as he gestures at the door of the convenience store and bows at Kyungsoo. "After you."

They pick out bags of chips, with Kyungsoo relying on a distant memory of a movie night with Zitao and Sehun at Chanyeol's place, all sorts of flavors in a big bowl of snacks. They grab some fruits, too, and a can of 'Absolute W' for Soohyun. Baekhyun takes too many bars of chocolates and takes a tub of mint ice cream, and Kyungsoo raises an eyebrow at him. "I thought you were freezing?" he asks, and Baekhyun simply grins as he pulls out his credit card and hands it to the lady at the cashier.

"I said I was freezing, not dying." He grabs Kyungsoo by the shoulders, shaking him lightly, and Kyungsoo only rolls his eyes. "Live a little, grumpy grandpa Soo!"

Baekhyun's phone rings a few times before he picks up, and he lets out a little yelp when a voice call pop-up appears. Jongdae's forehead occupies at least half of the entire screen and, behind him, Chanyeol is carrying Soohyun, surprisingly giggly in Chanyeol's arms, and waving at the camera. "Lookie lookie lookie, there's Baekhyun-appa!" comes Jongdae's voice, a notch higher from when Kyungsoo had last heard Jongdae speak, and Chanyeol holds Soohyun's arms up and brings her closer to the screen. There isn't any line right now, not at this time of the day, and it takes Baekhyun a few minutes to tear his gaze away from the video even as the lady at the cashier calls his attention, confirming if he'll be paying using the card he'd just handed over.

Kyungsoo slips his card in the lady's direction and whispers, "Use this, instead," signing the receipt even before Baekhyun could turn back to him with wide eyes.

"I can't believe you!" Baekhyun exclaims, nudging him with his elbow, and Kyungsoo only shakes his head as he tries to wipe away the silly grin on his lips, as he tries hard to choke down the bubbling happiness at the pit of his stomach, threatening to creep up his throat and slip from his lips in a sliver of laughter.

He catches Jongdae's gaze, heavy and assessing, on the screen. Baekhyun catches him in a headlock just before he could shoot a questioning gaze right back at Jongdae. He feels the smooth texture of Baekhyun's shirt against his cheeks, the warmth of Baekhyun's skin through the cloth, the steady, heavy beating in Baekhyun's chest loud — deafening.

☁

Awards season approaches, and Kyungsoo quickly scrolls past advertising news in his Facebook feed to ease the clawing pain in his chest. It's been a little over a month since he'd decided to take a leap of faith and leave Masscom, and the change in routine — from work and sleep and work some more to waking up and dealing with happy people — has been really refreshing. There's still a hollow part in his chest, though, the space where air passes through freely and leaves him shivering in the cold, and he knows deep in his heart that the void is something going back to media and immersing himself in the good ol' chaos might be able to fill.

Chanyeol stretches out on the rubber mat, flat on his back, and yawns. The play area has just been vacated, thanks to Jonghyun and Jinki bringing the children to the learning area, and Sehun and Zitao have excused themselves to grab something to drink and snacks. They can be alone here, where the glass walls are frosted and shielding a bit of what's happening inside from the view of spectators, but Kyungsoo maintains a safe distance, nonetheless, a width of five hands away from Chanyeol, lying flat on his tummy. There are still at least twenty people just beyond these walls and in the learning area, after all.

"I like the silence but, at the same time, less walk-ins means less money," Chanyeol mumbles. Kyungsoo looks to his side — Chanyeol's eyelids flutter closed just in time, accentuating his eyelashes, and, for a moment, he feels a funny tingle at the tips of his fingers, a strong pull that makes him reach over and makes the pads of his fingers tickle Chanyeol's cheek. Chanyeol smiles. "I mean I really, really love my job, but sometimes it drives me crazy, y'know?"

"The kids? You mean Sehun and Zitao, right?"

"Of course." Chanyeol pushes himself off the floor at the sound of the door opening. Kyungsoo follows suit, retracting his hand, fingers suddenly cold at the absence of Chanyeol's warmth. "And Jonghyun and Jinki and you."

Kyungsoo means to ask, what do you mean 'and you'?, because he knows he's been doing everything right, even going over and above the minimum requirement to make sure that the kids staying at XOXO have the time of their lives, but his thoughts are cut off by Jongdae walking in, hands wound tightly around the handle of the stroller and phone tucked between his cheek and his shoulder. "I told you, I just got here. I don't drive like you, okay," Jongdae says into receiver, and Kyungsoo's sure now that he's talking to Baekhyun whose inability to drive safely makes Jongdae worry half the time. Jongdae bows a little and smiles before saying into the receiver, "Whatever, you owe me. I'm gonna leave her with— Yes, yes, I know it can't be anyone else but Kyungsoo."

Kyungsoo feels his throat tightening, and he bites the inside of his cheek to keep himself from grinning.

"Do you use your magic touch on Baekhyun, too?" Chanyeol asks, a corner of his lips tugging up, and Kyungsoo simply cocks an eyebrow at Chanyeol. Saving face is important in the face of someone they aren't too familiar with yet; if this was Baekhyun in front of them, he'd have reached up to twist one of Chanyeol's ears with his fingers.

"So!" Jongdae chirps, slipping his phone back in his pocket. Kyungsoo quickly turns his head, facing Jongdae now. He notices the dark circles under Jongdae's eyes, the downward slope of the cheeks, the strain on the jaw when Jongdae tries to offer a smile as he pushes Soohyun's stroller forward. "Really tough time at work. Everybody's swamped and Baek's hands are shaking because he's had his third cup of coffee—"

Kyungsoo worries his bottom lip. "No sleep?" He then looks at Soohyun, then runs a hand along her cheek and gives it a light pinch. "Has Soohyunnie been sleeping well?"

"No luck for Baek. He's been up for at least 36 hours now." Jongdae frowns. Chanyeol makes a tiny squeak and, from the corner of his eye, he can see Chanyeol fumbling with the hem of his untucked polo shirt. "Soohyun's been getting a lot of rest but she can sense his stress. She starts sobbing everytime he picks her up."

"Oh man. That can't be good," Chanyeol comments. He exhales loudly, and Kyungsoo steals a glance at Chanyeol. He's always been more attuned with the emotions of children more than anyone else in the daycare, only rivaled by Joonmyun who knows exactly how someone is feeling just by giving him a once-over. "We'd be glad to help in any way we can, especially with Soohyun. I mean… Baekhyun isn't just an ordinary client, after all."

He's a regular. A pretty demanding regular, Kyungsoo tells himself as he silences the other voices in his head. "He's a friend," he says, unceremonious, and gulps hard before he continues, "A really… good friend."

Jongdae cocks an eyebrow, subtle but still visible, and smiles a little. It's Chanyeol who twists his torso to get a better view of Kyungsoo, eyes questioning — not only curious but genuinely piqued — as he cocks his head slightly. Kyungsoo is rarely ever completely transparent, a thin veil of professionalism always shielding him from public scrutiny and condemnation, even when he's already inebriated, but his body acts against him this time, numbing the tips of his fingers, making the muscles in his throat clench. He can't choke it up to lack of caffeine in his system this time — it's two in the afternoon and he has a few more hours left until caffeine dissipates from his body completely.

"Soohyunnie is pretty special," Kyungsoo rushes. He nods slowly when he finishes, unable to find more words, then clasps his hands in front of him.

"She is," Jongdae says, raised eyebrow resting back into its original position. The corners of his lips are softer now, tugged up, revealing more of his cat-like smile. Soohyun would probably look better with that, but inheriting Baekhyun's boxy, comical smile isn't so bad, either. "And Baekhyun has faith in your magic touch so… yeah. He asked me to ask you to take care of her."

"There are too many 'ask's' in that sentence," Chanyeol says, laughing a little, and the tension in Jongdae's cheek muscles lifts altogether.

Jongdae checks and double-checks Soohyun's things before turning to Chanyeol to settle the payment, and Kyungsoo busies himself with making sure Soohyun is comfortably sleeping in the crib, parking her stroller beside it. Chanyeol and Jongdae's voices drop to a whisper, and Kyungsoo doesn't attempt to strain his hearing to figure out what they're talking about, simply keeps his eyes on Soohyun and watches the steady rise and fall of her chest, the small, slow-forming smile on her lips. don't forget to eat, he texts to Baekhyun just before Soohyun stirs, and lays his phone face down on the floor in exchange for a sobbing Soohyun, a frown pulling down on her cheeks, little beads of tears staining them.

Only minutes later, when Jongdae says his thanks for the last time and leaves, does Kyungsoo begin to wonder why he'd taken out his phone to send Baekhyun a message, completely out of reflex, like thinking of Baekhyun's welfare is the most normal thing in the world.

☁

Jongdae sends him an address to some building at six in the evening.

"I threw Baekhyun out of the office and onto his bed," comes Jongdae's voice on the other end of the line, the wind catching on the receiver and muffling his words a little. He repeats himself after a while, and Kyungsoo lets out a sigh as he leans back into his seat. "He looked like he was about to collapse and, well, yeah. You know how he is — he works hard and keeps going at things until he's worn out—"

—drives from the office to the daycare and then to wherever his meeting is, drives from Jongno-gu to Jung-gu and then to Sinchon-dong where he lives, all for the welfare of his child. Stays up late working on presentations and creating ideas out of nothing to make sure that he can present the best and be the best employee ever, so he can come home to Soohyun giggling and waving her arms about, so he can be the best appa that he could possibly be.

"And there's no choice but for him to seek help," Kyungsoo finishes. He takes a deep breath and waves at one of the children leaving the daycare, giving the kid a small smile before he continues, "But he'll put it off as much as possible because, as much as he's annoying, he actually hates bothering people."

Jongdae snorts, then chuckles, a combination that Kyungsoo has heard quite a number of times already. Jongdae rarely ever uses it when talking about other people, but that's how things are with Baekhyun, Kyungsoo supposes. Baekhyun has this uncanny ability to make people do things they normally wouldn't — make Jongdae snort in front of someone he's hardly known for a month despite the suit and the tie, make Sehun warm up in a few days and buy him bubble tea, make Chanyeol grow accustomed to a new person all too easily and maybe be a bit careless. Make Kyungsoo stop relying too much on facts and more on gut feel and just hope for the best.

"I was going to say 'and decide to not give a fuck about every single thing'," Jongdae replies after a while. "So yeah, can you… do me a favor and bring Soohyun home? I'm not sure if I can travel more than a few meters without falling asleep while walking."

"As long as these directions are actually correct," Kyungsoo answers. "And please, get some rest."

He hangs up after a while and scans the daycare, looking for the wall clock. Chanyeol had moved it earlier this week, saying that sunlight always hits the reflective surface and blinds his eyes, and for the first time in so long Kyungsoo felt lucky to not be the same height as Chanyeol. He has two more hours to waste away in the daycare, two more hours until he can bring Soohyun home to her father and breathe life into Baekhyun again, a few minutes to take a chance and prepare Soohyun's milk if he wants to leave early and make sure Soohyun doesn't miss her eating time during the drive. He takes a deep breath and gets up, knocks on Chanyeol's door tentatively before turning the knob.

"I heard your convo," Chanyeol says from behind him. Kyungsoo almost jumps, nails digging into his skin when he clenches his fists too tight. "Go, go, you have somewhere else to be."

He takes a step back, then one step forward, looking up at Chanyeol and studying his eyes, the dark circles under his eyes, the light upward tug of his cheeks and his lips. "I'll make it up to you," he says, letting out all the air he'd kept in his chest, and Chanyeol reaches over to ruffle his hair. The sudden surge of warmth makes him wince, even tremble a little, and Chanyeol only chuckles when he swats Chanyeol's hand away.

There's a good twenty minutes between Sinchon-dong and XOXO, still and quiet minutes with Soohyun's soft humming as the only dissonance. He glances at the address he'd written on a sticky note earlier, the chunky letters standing out against the bright pink paper, and mutters the words under his breath, again and again until the sound of his own voice makes him scrunch his nose.

The last time he's been in Sinchon-dong was back in college, fresh from dancing in a bar, with alcohol sloshing in his stomach and Joonmyun's arm around his shoulder. Joonmyun had kept him on his feet then, as they made their way to the curb and hailed a cab. Joonmyun's alcohol tolerance was okay, at best, and Kyungsoo's was usually better, but his goal that night was to get so smashed in celebration of passing the final exams and moving onto his third year in university and Joonmyun returning from military service. And there was another reason, not part of the press release — Kyungsoo had seen Chanyeol with a girl then, near the path to the open field in Yonsei, sucking face with her. Perhaps he was celebrating, too, Kyungsoo had thought then, and he'd grabbed Joonmyun by the wrist and told him that they had to drink, had to get themselves ass drunk to the point of regretting the mere mention of the word 'alcohol'. Three in the morning and too many shots of tequila after, he was beginning to think that the clawing pain in his chest when he'd seen the flash of surprise — panic, fear — in Chanyeol's features was ten times better than lugging around alcohol in his body.

Joonmyun had kept him in check then, stayed with him in his dorm in Sinchon, rubbed his back until he threw up nearly all the alcohol he'd downed that evening. There is no Joonmyun now to make sure he's driving down the right road and taking the right turns, so he shakes his head lightly and fixes his eyes ahead.

He fishes for Baekhyun's key from underneath a plant pot — "And it was a good thing I had the foresight to put it there," Jongdae had said earlier — and slips it in the hole, turning the knob carefully so as to not make much noise. The place is dark, quiet, and the only source of light is the warm yellow lights a few feet away from the doorway, and then the lights in the living room where the aftermath of many sleepless nights lies — one notebook stacked after the other, cups of instant noodles on one side of the desk, a blazer and a cardigan and something that looks a lot like a university jacket in a pile on the couch, and dress shoes creating a trail to the room. Kyungsoo pushes the stroller forward, careful not to apply too much force so that Soohyun won't be startled, and stops just a few feet from the door to the bedroom.

There's a sliver of light from inside, and Kyungsoo can see Baekhyun's feet peeking from under the covers. He smiles to himself and crouches to give Soohyun a light kiss on the nose. "Kyungsoo-oppa will be back, okay? He just needs to check on Soohyunnie's appa."

Soohyun presses her hands on his cheeks and pulls him forward, their noses rubbing now as she makes indiscernible sounds. "Fine, fine, I'll take you with me," he says, relenting, then gently picks Soohyun up from the stroller.

The lighting is much warmer in the bedroom, and there isn't a trace of the chaos here, not a single sheet of paper on the floor or shoes haphazardly thrown in a corner. Kyungsoo looks around for a while, and stops to look at what Soohyun is pointing at — a crib with pink legs and arches, and white linings accentuating the edges. No mobiles hanging above it or too many pillows in the crib — the sheets are a clean and plain white, and there's just one tiny, fluffy pillow on its surface.

He puts Soohyun down there on her request and slowly makes his way to the center of the room where the bed is.

The blanket has bunched up on both ends, covering only a portion of Baekhyun's legs, and his face is hidden beneath all his hair. Kyungsoo takes a deep breath as he leans close, close, closer, until he doesn't have to strain his arm anymore when he reaches out to brush some of Baekhyun's hair away from his face. There's a soft, warm flush on Baekhyun's cheeks once his face clears, hair tucked behind his ear now, and the movement at the back of his eyelids is rapid — he's probably deep in sleep now, finally getting a much needed break from work, and Kyungsoo slowly withdraws his hand before he can even wake Baekhyun up.

Make him juk! Chanyeol had called after him before he drove off. He can definitely do that while waiting for Baekhyun to rouse from his sleep.

He's already halfway through getting off the bed when Baekhyun shifts, rolling over until he bumps into Kyungsoo's arm. Quickly, Kyungsoo inches away, retreating his hand, but too late — Baekhyun's already making these tiny whimpers and groans, scrunching his nose as he slowly opens his eyes. There's nothing but silence for a few moments, and Kyungsoo takes a deep breath, waits for Baekhyun to push him off the bed and ask why he's here, how he got here, why are you on my bed and why did you tuck my hair behind my ear—

"Kyung… soo?" Baekhyun's voice is low, rough, heavy with sleep and fatigue. The corners of his lips tug up, then down, up again after he blinks a few times. Baekhyun's gaze travels from Kyungsoo's eyes down to the base of this throat, along the length of his arm and down to where his hand meets Baekhyun's waist. He laughs weakly. "What are you doing here?"

He worries his bottom lip for a while and clenches the hand not in Baekhyun's plain sight, just watches the lazy movement of Baekhyun's eyes and the slow-forming smile on his lips. Baekhyun wraps his fingers around Kyungsoo's wrist, and Kyungsoo's breath hitches when the cool pads of Baekhyun's fingers touch his skin. Baekhyun rubs his thumb in an easy pattern on the underside of Kyungsoo's wrist. It tickles, but not the kind that weeds a giggle out of you; instead, it makes the muscles in Kyungsoo's throat clench, a thick lump of air heavy in his chest.

"Soohyun," he chokes out after a while, voice cracking the way it does when he's spoken too much or spoken too little. Another stroke along the vein, and Kyungsoo takes a deep breath as he continues, "I brought her here. Jongdae said you won't be able to come over, so—"

Baekhyun laughs a little, and he lets his hand drop, resting just above Kyungsoo's. "I said, what are you doing here?"

Here means beside Baekhyun, on Baekhyun's bed, Kyungsoo letting his lack of control get the better of him. Here means the very little space between them and the way Baekhyun's hand covers all of his, his slender fingers fitting between the webs of Kyungsoo's own. Here means Baekhyun's focused gaze and all the sleep leaving his eyes as he focuses his vision and Kyungsoo seeing himself reflected in Baekhyun's eyes.

Soohyun makes a tiny, hiccuping sound, and Kyungsoo feels a violent breath of life in his lungs. He lifts his fingers a little, hooking them on Baekhyun's own and squeezing just a little. "I thought it might be nice to make sure you're still alive," he says then, and Baekhyun falls back into his bed in a fit of laughter.

Baekhyun finally lets go after a while, hand resting on the small of Kyungsoo's back briefly as they both walk over to where Soohyun's crib is. "You want anything for dinner?" Kyungsoo asks, and Baekhyun looks straight at him, runs his gaze down to the tip of his nose, his lips, his chin and his collarbones, all the way to his hips, before shrugging to say, "Anything, as long as it tastes good." So he excuses himself to work his way around Baekhyun's kitchen, clean despite the ruckus on the other side of the wall, and allows himself a few minutes of silence, just him and the low thrumming of the fridge and his pulse throbbing against the kitchen counter, closes his eyes as he tries to will away the feeling of Baekhyun's hand in his, Baekhyun's soft smile, and the way Baekhyun took a little more time staring at his lips than the rest of his body.

☁

The sun is already up high when he wakes up. Light filters through the curtains and casts a soft glow on the sheets all around him. He turns around to lie flat on his stomach, scrunching his nose a little, until he catches the sound of choked laughter and a gasp from a few feet away.

He blinks a few times as he turns around to push himself off the bed. The gurgling grows louder, the voice lilting and, when he turns his head to the sound of his voice, he notices the foreign-looking things in the room, a poster he's sure he has never had in his own bedroom, and Baekhyun crouched near the crib, one hand gently holding Soohyun up.

"Sh-sh-she's— She's standing!"

Last night seems more of a distant memory than anything else. He remembers making juk for Baekhyun, remembers Baekhyun watching over his shoulder and rushing back to the room from time to time to check on Soohyun. He remembers a conversation about really, really, really having to slow down now, after all the times Baekhyun had fallen sick following a pitch or a long and trying period of little to no sleep. And then there's Baekhyun reaching out, scowling when his hand brushes against the pot of juk, then holding his hand as they talked about tomorrow and vacation leaves spent shopping for toys in COEX.

He has a kid. He's probably not into men getting pregnant. He has a kid, Kyungsoo reminds himself, but his train of thought is set off-track when Baekhyun looks at him, the grin on his lips wide and toothy, eyes almost disappearing into slits as he repeats, "She's standing!"

Kyungsoo walks over to where the two are and gets on his knees, folding his legs to sit on them as he leans closer to Soohyun. Soohyun's hand looks so small as she grips one of the legs of the crib tightly, and there's a line of concentration in the way she furrows her eyebrows ever so slightly, lips pressed together as her knees wobble. She breaks out into tiny sobs when her knees give away, but Baekhyun catches her, cooing as he takes her in his arms and rubs circles on her back as he waits for the crying to subside. "Kyungsoo-oppa, will you please make me smile?" Baekhyun says in that high tone of his, whiny and almost pitchy and really, really annoying, if you didn't know he was trying to sound like a kid and not just trying to wage war against Kyungsoo.

But Kyungsoo knows. He knows Baekhyun more than he should, and his body knows that Baekhyun moves around in his sleep more than he should because he can feel a dull ache in his legs, calves, his arms. "But Kyungsoo-oppa is still sleepy," he says, teasing, and Baekhyun kicks him lightly, cold toes grazing this lower leg a little.

He leans closer, pressing a light kiss on Soohyun's nose, and Soohyun hiccups midway through a sob. He then brings his hands up to cover his face and closes his eyes, thinks of a funny face that has worked countless times on Seungsoo's kids and has made Yura's twins laugh after Yura has fed them vegetables. Slowly, he draws his hands apart, widening his eyes at the same time that Soohyun's face comes into focus. Soohyun giggles, but there are still traces of tears at the corners of her eyes, so Kyungsoo tries again, and again, and again, until Soohyun's clapping and extending her arms in his direction, the pads of her tiny fingers touching his nose.

He brings his hands together again, side-to-side, closing his eyes before he pulls them apart. "Peek-a—" He opens his eyes, then, the smile on his lips prying his lips apart to stretch into a full grin, and what greets him is Baekhyun's face, a small constellation of pimples on one cheek, a bright red patch that looks like a small hand on the other, and the mole just above Baekhyun's lips, teasing, taunting, coaxing him to let his gaze travel south to the dip of Baekhyun's upper lip and the wicked curves at the corners.

"—Boo," Baekhyun finishes, voice soft, barely above a whisper. His breath is warm on the tip of Kyungsoo's nose. It tickles. Kyungsoo can feel Baekhyun's gaze, sees a glimpse of it at the corner of his vision, but all he can think of is how he can't tear his eyes away from Baekhyun's pretty lips, how it would feel to suck on that mole and tease the corners of Baekhyun's mouth—

Baekhyun licks his lips, tongue laving on the pink flesh, and Kyungsoo gulps hard. He feels his hands twitching, curling into ball into fists in an attempt to hold himself back.

"Oh shit, you're heavy," Baekhyun grumbles, leaning back as he hoists Soohyun up and makes her sit on his lap. Kyungsoo pulls away, then, breathing through his nose noisily. There's nothing but the sound of Soohyun's soft giggles and Baekhyun's chuckling, but Kyungsoo catches Baekhyun looking up at him from time to time, holding his gaze until Soohyun pounds her fists on Baekhyun's chest.

He has a kid, and the kid likes me, a voice at the back of Kyungsoo's head says, and he pushes it down, enduring the tightness and dryness in his throat as he casts one last glance at the two before getting on his feet to prepare breakfast.

☁

Kyungsoo walks into the daycare with two boxes of pizza and six cups of coffee as company. Baekhyun had brewed the coffee right earlier, but Soohyun decided it was good to play with the sugar and put too many scoops in Kyungsoo's coffee. She'd kept her eyes on him the whole time, and who was he to deny the kid of the pleasure of seeing him fight the squirm threatening to take control of his face? So he took a sip, and another, and another, until Soohyun was clapping and Baekhyun was handing him a glass of cold water, apologetic yet giggling.

"I was beginning to think you were—" Dead, Kyungsoo finishes in his head. He saw that coming from a mile away, but Sehun's actions always betray his words as he gives Kyungsoo a quick hug and ruffles his hair. "You got me my staple drink?" Sehun asks now, taking the boxes and placing them on the counter, then calls for Zitao. "Down to the last detail?"

"Brambleberry shit with half and half milk and whatever drizzle?"

Zitao chuckles. "You're missing the tapioca, Soo," he comments, and Sehun gives him a grin, tight at the corners, and pinches his arm lightly.

"Brambleberry iced tea with whole milk and strawberry drizzle," Kyungsoo says, relenting as he takes a deep breath. "With coffee jelly, though I don't know how you can stand all those flavors in one drink."

Sehun gives him a thumbs up and ruffles his hair one more time before taking the boxes to the faculty area, whistling as he goes on his way.

"Dare you question maknae's taste?" says Chanyeol now, making his way to the reception from his office. He's got his bangs bunched up, tied together in a fountain, and his glasses slip from the bridge of his nose. The dark circles under his eyes are more visible than before. Kyungsoo takes a step forward to push Chanyeol's glasses back, and Chanyeol pokes his tummy with a finger. "You could've taken the whole day off, you know. How's Baekhyun?"

Freshly showered and playing with Soohyun at home, he wants to say, but Chanyeol has always liked getting a general idea of things before delving into the details. So instead, he says, "Alive," pulling away and tightening his hold on the coffee carrier. "Jongdae?"

They start walking to the faculty area, almost bumping into Zitao who's running after his son, Jin, and Chanyeol takes the carrier from Kyungsoo's hand. Their knuckles brush when their hands meet halfway, and Chanyeol is the first to break contact. Kyungsoo furrows his eyebrows a little. "Well, he wasn't panicking when he dropped by this morning. Just wondering where you were because Baekhyun didn't come in."

Kyungsoo snorts. "I don't see the connection." He quickens his pace, half-expecting Chanyeol to catch up and half-hoping Chanyeol won't. The bell is ringing and Sehun will probably be leaving the faculty area in a while, because he still needs to round up his students and convince them that sitting still isn't such a bad thing, and coffee and pizza is a great combination for a noon time talk. They've had weirder lunch meals before. "But okay. As long as he's breathing, I guess. He sounded really worried yesterday."

"I called your landline last night," Chanyeol says, slowly now, drawing out each syllable. Their arms brush against each other. Chanyeol feels warmer than the coffee in the carrier. "Nobody picked up."

Chanyeol has always been good at coaxing answers out of people. It's a special skill, Kyungsoo thinks, or maybe it's just Chanyeol's patience that overpowers other people's resolve to keep everything to themselves. And maybe that's the difference between them — Chanyeol waits until the other person is comfortable enough to open up, using only choice words and sentences to ease the other into sharing; Kyungsoo waits because rushing into things has only ever led to bad results — getting drunk at the age of twenty-two, falling back into Joonmyun's arms and turning around only to realize how close their faces are.

"I stayed the night at Baekhyun's," he confesses. Chanyeol locks the door behind him, then places the carrier on the dining table. "Soohyun wouldn't let me leave."

Chanyeol laughs a little. He motions for Kyungsoo to take the seat beside his, patting the space, and pulls Kyungsoo by the wrist when Kyungsoo doesn't give in. "Soohyun? You mean her dad, right? Come on, Kyungsoo. You're talking to me — Park Chanyeol, bestest best friend ever, the dude who saved your ass too many times and has showered with you for four years because we're roommates—"

"Also the guy whose ass I saved when he overworked himself," Kyungsoo continues, finishing with a small, tight-lipped smile that has Chanyeol frowning. "I stayed for Soohyun. Baekhyun just… happened to be there."

"I've seen the way you look at him."

"I've seen the way you've been looking at the coffee." Kyungsoo takes Chanyeol's arm, holding him by the wrist, pulling until Chanyeol's hand is hovering his cup. "Go. Drink. Now."

"Jongdae said," Chanyeol begins, pausing to take the cup and take off the cap. "That Baekhyun's a wreck right now. Was a wreck — sorry — before Soohyun came." He plays with the rim for a while, scowling when the sharp surface stings his skin a little. "That he was struggling with the baby at first, but now things are so much better, have been better these past few months, ever since—"

Kyungsoo takes a deep breath. "The day found out about the daycare," Kyungsoo continues. He laughs a little, scratchy as the sound fades. "It's made his life as a dad ten times easier—

"Ever since," Chanyeol repeats through gritted teeth, as if telling Kyungsoo to stop thinking and just focus on listening. "He met you."

That's the same, isn't it? Kyungsoo wants to ask, but he knows very well that while Chanyeol has an opinion on anything and everything, he is very mindful of the things he says, sometimes a bit too careful with his words. It's part of the training to be an effective copywriter, and Chanyeol has done so well in his job in the past and in this life-long job he's employed in. "Hmm," Kyungsoo says, words escaping him completely, and he holds Chanyeol's gaze until it flickers, traveling to where the pizza boxes are. His hands feel too cold despite being wrapped around his hot cup of coffee, and Chanyeol's movements look as if he's being constrained by the suspenders he wears everyday, hesitating as he decides on which pizza slice to take, tentative as he looks up to meet Kyungsoo's eyes again. This isn't the familiar feeling that envelops him when he sits opposite Chanyeol in a restaurant or when Chanyeol snakes an arm around his shoulder to ruffle his hair.

"She's standing now," Kyungsoo says after a while, pausing from taking a sip of his drink. Something in Chanyeol's eyes lights up, making the corners of his eyes crinkle. "With assistance, of course, but the little girl is standing now and she's been crawling faster and—"

The tight corners of Chanyeol's lips ease, and his cheeks tug up as his mouth relaxes into a smile. Kyungsoo's phone beeps twice, and what greets him when he unlocks his phone is a picture of Baekhyun holding up a sobbing Soohyun, with Baekhyun imitating the face she is making at the camera. "Sorry you have to take care of two kids," Chanyeol says, voice lighter now, the same old tone Kyungsoo has gotten used to, and Kyungsoo doesn't fight the strong upward tug on the corners of his lips, eyes drawing into half-slits as he gives the picture another look, and another, and another.

☁

"Google's looking for an industry strategist and, well, I… may or may not have given them a link to your online resume..."

Kyungsoo brings his chopsticks down, cocking an eyebrow at Joonmyun as he does so. Joonmyun is unfazed, still wearing the same smile he'd carried with him when they met up at the entrance of the samgyupsal place, and Kyungsoo leans closer as he holds Joonmyun's gaze. "Whatever gave you the idea that I wanted to work for Google?" he asks, careful not to raise his voice — Joonmyun hates making a scene, and Kyungsoo hates drawing attention to himself. It's one of the few things they completely agree on.

"I remember everything, you know," Joonmyun replies. He turns over a piece of the meat before turning his attention back to Kyungsoo. "I know the titles of Jongin's favorite comics and the names of your favorite artists—"

"Even the Western ones?"

"Especially the Western ones," Joonmyun affirms, a corner of his lips tugging up even more. "And I remember what you told me three years ago, before they moved you from traditional media planning to digital media — you said you wanted to try your luck and give Google a shot if they were willing to give you a chance." He reaches for one of the pieces with his chopsticks, then picks it up to place it on Jongin's plate. "And this is your chance! The timing is perfect — you're unemployed and you want to try something new—"

Kyungsoo hums under his breath, squinting as he tries to form a cohesive sentence in his mind that won't sound like I'm actually employed but I'm not being paid for what I'm doing, because he knows better than to broach the subject of pro-bono work in Joonmyun's presence. "I'm not really unemployed. Just… trying to figure things out. Gather data before I make a conclusion and make call up companies that have been asking for an interview," he says, exhaling through his nose as he scoffs a little. "I've got a couple waiting for me to call them back. I haven't been spending my idle time lounging around, hyung."

"You've been spending it what that kid," Jongin quips. "What's her name? Soojung?"

"Soohyun, Kyungsoo corrects. "She can stand now," he adds. "And she can say appa. I'm pretty sure that, in a few weeks, she'll be able to—" He doesn't notice that he's smiling until Joonmyun furrows his eyebrows at him. It's not tension that he feels in the muscles of his cheeks; it's a force he doesn't bother to fight. "Hyung?"

"Just—" Joonmyun worries his bottom lip just a little, then says, "—you've got to stop trying to save everyone."

"I am not," he argues, because it's true — he's not saving anyone, and he's certainly not saving himself. He's just trying something new, enjoying what he's doing for the first time in months. He didn't even see this coming, certainly hadn't anticipated to be waking up at six in the morning everyday to report to work at seven-thirty or even earlier, surrounding himself with kids and kids at heart. He didn't expect to find Baekhyun, and for Soohyun to find him.

Joonmyun shrugs, then places a piece of meat on Kyungsoo's plate. Jongin gives him extra kimchi and a small smile. "Okay," Joonmyun says, exhaling loudly. "If that's what you say."

His phone sounds off thrice on his way home — an email notification and two text messages. The text Google Inc. blinks at him innocently from the notifications pane, while Chanyeol and Baekhyun's names scramble for his attention. i hope u said hi to joonmyun-hyung 4 me, Chanyeol says, bcos he's been worried abt u but i told him ur still alive. He hits the brakes when he sees the red light and types up a reply — he says thank you for making sure i'm still alive — and opens Baekhyun's message, shaking his head as he hits the back button from viewing a selca of Baekhyun and Soohyun, a picture of the two with their faces smushed, bright smiles rivaling that of Seoul's night lights.

☁

Autumn's wrath comes full circle when Kyungsoo gets a call at five in the morning, Baekhyun's panicked voice ridding Kyungsoo of all his drowsiness all too quickly. "Soohyun's crying. She won't stop crying. I've been trying to calm her down but nothing is working and I think she has a fever and—" And Kyungsoo pushes himself off the bed, pulls on the first pair of pants he sees and slips on a sweater before heading out. And he stays on the line throughout the drive from Apgeujong to Sinchon, listening to Baekhyun talk out his worries and sing Soohyun to sleep. And he wraps his arms around Baekhyun when Baekhyun opens the door, eyes red-rimmed and puffy.

And Baekhyun buries his face in the crook of Kyungsoo's neck, whispering, I was scared, so scared. I thought I was going to lose her.

"36.3," Kyungsoo announces now, then takes a swab of cotton to wet it with alcohol, cleaning the tip of the thermometer with it. He sees Baekhyun's shoulder relax, falling just a little as he sinks in his seat, then shifts to lean closer to Soohyun and rest his chin on his folded arms. The dark circles under his eyes are more visible now and his hair sticks to his face, so Kyungsoo reaches over once he has returned the thermometer in its container and brushes Baekhyun's bangs away from his eyes.

Baekhyun looks up at him, bottom lip jutted out, the corners of his lips still turned down in a frown. This is worse than the look Kyungsoo had seen the day they met — that was uncertainty with a hint of panic; this one is fear and sadness. Baekhyun chuckles just lightly, though, leaning closer but holding Kyungsoo's gaze, and Kyungsoo feels his chest constrict a little as Baekhyun says, "Kyungsoo-oppa, make me feel well, too," drawling each syllable, the sound rolling off his tongue lazily.

Baekhyun's eyelashes are long, Kyungsoo notices, and his lips are chapped. The pimples have disappeared, too, but his cheeks are flush — drunk with fatigue and lack of sleep.

"I'm not your oppa," Kyungsoo replies, but he threads his fingers through Baekhyun's hair, anyway. Baekhyun leans into the touch, eyes fluttering closed, and Kyungsoo takes a shaky breath as he watches the path Baekhyun's tongue takes as Baekhyun wets his lower lip.

He doesn't realize he's been staring until he catches Baekhyun's gaze — eyes crinkling at the corners — the peculiar curl of the lip, the slender finger running down the column on his neck. He gulps hard against the cold press of Baekhyun's finger, all the air he'd sucked in earlier trapped in his throat. The rest of Baekhyun's fingers fall on the base of Kyungsoo's neck. "Juk?"

Kyungsoo exhales, the knots in his stomach easing a little. Baekhyun hasn't moved an inch. "Juk," Kyungsoo repeats. "For the sick kid."

There's a pained expression in Baekhyun's features as he winks, and Kyungsoo only shakes his head before getting up to prepare food.

Moving around in Baekhyun's kitchen feels a lot like home, somehow, when he doesn't have to second guess himself when he pulls drawers in search of cooking tools, or rummages through the contents of the fridge to look for specific ingredients that he just knows Baekhyun has in stock. He soaks less rice in a bowl because he knows Baekhyun likes his juk thinner than the usual, and shakes his head as he takes out the hotdog from the freezer. There's never enough unprocessed food in Baekhyun's fridge, and he's mildly concerned about what Baekhyun will be feeding Soohyun when he gets older until he remembers that Baekhyun loves ordering takeout.

He knows too much about Baekhyun because of Soohyun, yet knows too little about him because he's Byun Baekhyun, and Byun Baekhyun doesn't divulge information easily. He lures people into his trap with an innocent smile and sweet words, and he'll watch as they struggle with its kinks to see if they'll hang around long enough to be able to undo the knots, or leave at the first sign of a challenge. If Baekhyun was a commercial, he'd be the comical kind, completely unassuming and laughable at first glance, but you'd stop to think and go back to him, studying every part of his body, the twist of the mouth and the quirk of the eyebrow, until you finally get the message. Byun Baekhyun is never without surprises, and Kyungsoo has finally come to love surprises. He might even consider rebranding himself as one.

"That hotdog juk is pretty interesting," Baekhyun says now, one arm pressed against the entrance to the kitchen and the other simply resting in his side. Kyungsoo only smiles in reply and fixes his eyes on the porridge, stirring continuously even as Baekhyun moves closer to tuck a chin on his shoulder.

Jongdae and Chanyeol come over in the afternoon, bearing a shopping bag filled with items Baekhyun had requested them to pick up — milk for Soohyun, chips and banana uyuu for Baekhyun's sanity, cotton swabs and alcohol in a bottle, and food for you two, because we're not feeding you. Baekhyun serves the leftover juk, nonetheless, and Chanyeol leans close to give the dish a sniff before turning to Kyungsoo with furrowed eyebrows. "You made juk?"

"He also made some when I was sick," Baekhyun adds. He scrunches his nose for a while, then rubs the tip before continuing, "Sort of."

Jongdae falls into conversation with Baekhyun while they score lines through the light cuts of the pizza slices and, across the table, Kyungsoo meets Chanyeol in the eye, one eyebrow raised and lips pressed into a tight-lipped smile. "I think something's missing..." Chanyeol says, voice trailing off, eyes flickering from Kyungsoo's own down to the packs of hot sauce just a few spaces away from Kyungsoo's hands, and Jongdae reaches for them even before Kyungsoo can move.

"If you wanted something, you could've just said so, y'know?" Jongdae teases, laughing when Chanyeol rolls his eyes at him. "Or wait, were you talking about ketchup?"

Kyungsoo laughs a little, faint and almost inaudible, and takes the pineapple from his pizza to place them on the slice Chanyeol is holding. "Sometimes, he doesn't know what he wants," he says, then walks to the other side to take the seat beside Chanyeol's. Their knees bump, and Chanyeol sort of flinches away, sort of jolts like he hadn't expected it. "Do you?"

"I want a lot of things. I guess you could say I'm ambitious."

"Greedy," Baekhyun retorts. A corner of Chanyeol's lips turns down and his eyes narrow, and Kyungsoo can see the tension in the shift of Chanyeol's arm muscles as Chanyeol eyes his foot, then Baekhyun's leg with great interest. "There is a thin line in between. Like a dog burying his favorite bone and a dog burying the bone then guarding that area."

"Or you eating three slices of pizza within five minutes," Jongdae interrupts. He swats Baekhyun's hand away, bumping his hip into Baekhyun's, and Baekhyun slinks away and walks to where Kyungsoo is. "Be a good dog and let the humans eat in peace."

Baekhyun leans back into his seat, hands now free of food and crumbs, and Chanyeol reaches over to where Baekhyun is, hand sliding across Kyungsoo's back before coming to rest on Baekhyun's nape. Kyungsoo doesn't address what's happening until he hears Baekhyun yelp, Chanyeol pinching Baekhyun's earlobe then tugging on it hard enough for Baekhyun to tip over. Baekhyun lets out a strangled noise, pressing his palm against Kyungsoo's thigh to keep himself from falling, and his hand slides down Kyungsoo's inner thigh as he tries to jab Chanyeol's arm with his other hand.

Kyungsoo can see the slice of pizza shaking in his hands, can feel Baekhyun's thumb rubbing circles on his thigh. Across the table, Jongdae is cackling, but his eyes haven't left Baekhyun just yet.

"You asshole!" Baekhyun exclaims, voice dropping to a whisper as he grumbles a few more words that sound more like sounds of protest than anything else. Jabs turn into light punches and Baekhyun draws his other hand up, the subtle movement of the tips of his fingers sending a tingling sensation to Kyungsoo's toes.

He rolls the slice of pizza and stuffs it in his mouth, chews on it as noisily as possible to drown out the voices in his head. When Baekhyun drops his fist and Chanyeol lets his face fall forward, resting on his pizza-free hand, Baekhyun withdraws his other hand all the way but replaces it with his right hand, a cold and light press on the inside of Kyungsoo's thigh, a complete contrast to the way Kyungsoo's heart races in his chest — heavy, thunderous, resounding.

☁

Rain comes pelting down just before seven in the evening. Jongdae stays by the windows, watching the droplets of water on the glass, and Chanyeol is sitting cross-legged on Baekhyun's couch, a pillow clutched close to his chest. "Forecast said it'll be cold, but I wasn't expecting this," Jongdae says, taking one last look at the scene just beyond the windows then turning to face the rest of the group. "Should we order food?"

"I can go out for a drive," Kyungsoo says, volunteering, but Baekhyun quickly bumps his hip into Kyungsoo's. "Relax. Your kid's fine. Her temperature won't shoot up while I'm away."

"But it's raining outside," Baekhyun grumbles. Jongdae starts dialing the number for his favorite pizza place and asks if everyone's okay with four-cheese and Hawaiian again. Chanyeol holds two thumbs up in agreement.

"I was serious, you know," Kyungsoo says now, taking Soohyun from Baekhyun's arms when Baekhyun starts grumbling. It's not that Baekhyun panics at the onset of danger — his mind is perfectly calm and he knows exactly what to do, but his body translates it differently, highlighting the emotions that he keeps at bay and laying them out in the open. Kyungsoo is a reminder that his mind and body can align, that Baekhyun has complete control over his limbs. It's a silent agreement they've worked out over the weeks they've spent taking care of Soohyun. "For all you know, I might be able to get back even before the delivery arrives and Soohyun won't even think of crying."

Soohyun looks up at Kyungsoo, eyes heavy-lidded but lips parted in a beautiful smile. Baekhyun takes a step forward, reaching out to cup one of Soohyun's cheeks. "The weather's awful right now. Driving won't be the wisest thing to do."

"Byun Baekhyun, thinking about safety?" Jongdae gasps, eyes wide and the back of his hand covering his mouth. Baekhyun frowns at him. "Is this the apocalypse? Should I start praying now?"

Baekhyun blows a kiss in Jongdae's direction, and Jongdae pretends to duck like he'll actually get hit. "Fuck you," he mutters, a wry smile on his lips and, when he turns to Kyungsoo, his lips tug down and his eyebrows furrow a little. "Hey, I don't want you to get into an accident. So be a nice kid and do as I say and cradle my kid to sleep, okay?"

Kyungsoo scoffs. "I don't fancy people ordering me around," he retorts, cocking an eyebrow slightly as Baekhyun leans back, a hint of surprise in the rise of his eyebrows. "Well, maybe I could make a few exceptions…" He licks his lips. "For my favorites."

There's a wide grin spread across Baekhyun's lips, reaching his eyes as the corners crinkle. "Am I one of your favorites, then?" he asks, leaning closer until Kyungsoo can feel Baekhyun's breath hot on his skin. Kyungsoo's breath hitches — Jongdae is only a few feet away from them and Chanyeol's watching, and they're not alone, and Baekhyun's bottom lip is too red, abused from Baekhyun's habit of biting it too much. "Am I your favorite client?"

Client. The sound of the word rolling off Baehyun's tongue sends shivers down his spine. Soohyun raps his chest, tiny hands balled into fists. He darts his tongue out again to wet his lips and Baekhyun's eyes follow the movement, the sharp rise of the chest in tandem with Kyungsoo swiping his tongue over the pink flesh—

"Pa…pa?"

Baekhyun looks up abruptly, eyebrows furrowed and mouth hanging agape as his gaze shifts from Soohyun to Kyungsoo and back. "What did you say, honey?" he asks, bending his knees a little so that he can hear Soohyun better, his ear just a few spaces away, and Soohyun looks up at Kyungsoo, taps her hands on Kyungsoo's chest as she says, again and again, papa, papa, papa!

Kyungsoo takes a deep breath. His throat feel oddly dry. There's a heavy beat in his chest, and it's not from Soohyun tapping a melody on it. He looks at Baekhyun. "She means you, right?"

Tension leaves Baekhyun's cheeks as he laughs, the corners of his lips that hang open awkwardly twisting to turn into a soft smile. "I'm pretty sure she means you, Soo."

Soohyun giggles, chuckles, laughs that high-pitched laughter of hers that pulls at the corners of Kyungsoo's lips, too hard that it's futile to resist. He nuzzles her nose, presses a soft kiss on it, then kisses her cheek. He can see the amused look in Jongdae's features and the disgruntlement when he fishes for his phone to take a call, can see Chanyeol standing a few feet behind Baekhyun, just staring, watching. There's a small and peculiar smile on Chanyeol's lips that Kyungsoo hasn't seen in a while. "Well, what do you know," Baekhyun whispers, voice scratchy and almost breathy but lilting just as he ends, and Kyungsoo swallows every urge to rip that smile from Baekhyun's lips and file it at the very back of his mind for a rainy day, tuck it in his heart for safe-keeping, imprint the memory of it on his own lips so that he'll never forget this moment.

☁

The drive home is mostly quiet, the silence broken only by Chanyeol's soft humming or turning up the radio then turning it off not more than a minute after. The rain hasn't quite subsided yet, but navigating through the streets of Seoul isn't as dangerous anymore. "Text me," was Baekhyun's last reminder before closing the door behind the two, and Kyungsoo only rolled his eyes in response, choking down the words threatening to fall from his lips.

"This is stupid," Chanyeol grumbles after a while. Kyungsoo steps on the brakes upon reaching a traffic light and pulls the gear shift up, then turns to Chanyeol. Chanyeol's lips are tugged down, the strain visible in the way his eye bags are highlighted by the downward pull of his cheeks. "You know what? If you say Baekhyun's just a friend then okay, I'll buy that shit. I respect your need to keep some secrets to yourself."

Kyungsoo holds his breath, and he feels the muscles in his throat clench as he waits for the 'but' following Chanyeol's statement. It's there in the way he still has an eyebrow raised, in the way his lips hang parted and air filters through his teeth, breathing coming out noisily. It's in the way Chanyeol's fingers curl, balling into a loose fist, and the way it stays there, hanging from his side, just a few inches shy of Kyungsoo's hand instead of lying flat on the back of Kyungsoo's hand.

"But?" Kyungsoo asks, then. He glances at the traffic light — 60 seconds. There's more than enough time if Chanyeol allows himself a few moments of weakness, if Chanyeol says what he means and doesn't go for fifty feet of long sentences to drive a point. "There's a 'but' there."

Chanyeol closes his eyes, chest rising as he inhales. He lets everything out in one shaky, resounding breath. "But you made him juk, and you said — you said before, years ago, when you made juk when I got discharged from the hospital — that you make that when you want to make yourself feel better," Chanyeol says. He worries his bottom lip, and Kyungsoo feels a familiar coiling in his stomach, a lurching sensation, one he'd continuously tried to push down to the deepest, darkest parts of him.

There are fears that you never quite outgrow, and Chanyeol — Chanyeol knowing too little and too much about him — is one of his greatest fears.

"You said you got that from Joonmyun-hyung. I mean, I don't know what happened the night you got ass drunk. I just know he took you home and rubbed your back while you threw up your guts and—" Chanyeol draws his hand close to his lips and nips lightly on a nail, and Kyungsoo quickly slaps his hand away. Chanyeol gestures at the timer for the traffic light, and the light turns green just in time for Kyungsoo to regain his focus. "I just want to know what's bothering you. I want to know how I can help. For a moment, I thought you were okay already. You seemed really… I don't know, happy? When you started working in the daycare? When you took care of Soohyun — really took care of her — for the very first time?"

Kyungsoo switches the turn signal on and maneuvers to the left. "I guess that's the thing," he begins, then gulps hard before continuing, "Everything was going well, too well, until…"

"You know I hate it when you do that," Chanyeol protests. "Finish what you started. Come on—" Another red light, another moment of surrender.

"Do you remember what I said before? About the happy chapters of my life ending just as soon as I get to the good part?" Kyungsoo chuckles a little. That was years ago, shortly after Chanyeol was released; it would be a miracle if Chanyeol remembered. But then Chanyeol remembers everything, notices everything — tiny bread crumbs at the corners of Kyungsoo's lips, the light furrow of Kyungsoo's eyebrows, the uneven foundation on Kyungsoo's cheek. "You know what happened with work — I was promoted and we were winning businesses, but that huge fuck up of our supplier basically screwed my entire career. College was a good run, then I found out that my dad — my real dad, the one my hyung helped me track down — actually left me in umma and appa's care when my mother died from giving birth to me. That he left because he thought I was a mistake and that he had his first family to support—"

"Whoa, whoa— I didn't know—" Chanyeol's eyebrows are furrowed, and Kyungsoo reaches over to ease the light know with a light press of the thumb. "Who knows about your being adopted?"

"Just my family. My new — my real family," he corrects. He sinks back in his seat, focusing his eyes on the slow-ticking traffic counter. "But nobody knew about my 'real father's' problem. I guess it's one of those things that are better left unsaid."

Chanyeol looks to his side and rests a hand on Kyungsoo's thigh. Kyungsoo feels the strain on his legs fade just a little. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine. It's part of living, this discovery," he continues. He loosens his grip on the steering wheel. "Umma made me rice cakes and juk that time, when hyung and I came back from that confrontation. And Joonmyun-hyung, he made me juk the morning I woke up hungover before third year in uni. They both said the same thing — that it's supposed to make me feel better, and that seeing me feeling better will make them happy. So I do the same for my friends — I cook to set my nerves at ease. I cook to keep myself from thinking too much and worrying about them."

Chanyeol laughs lightly, then turns down the aircon just a little. "So you made juk for Baekhyun twice, because he makes you think too much."

The light turns green again. "I guess you could say that."

Chanyeol doesn't speak until they pass three traffic lights, all green, and Kyungsoo makes a right turn at Chanyeol's street. "I have a suggestion. Just a suggestion, okay? What if you stopped thinking too much, stopping thinking about every damned thing, and just did what you wanted?"

That would be stupid, he wants to say, but the better half of his senses, the one that knows and is sure that there's merit in not studying every single detail and thinking of every consequence that venturing into a particular decision will entail, keeps him from parting his lips and saying something. His best decisions, those that he hasn't had any regret making, have all been a product of acting on gut feeling — sending his resume to a media agency instead of a prestigious brand, quitting the job that he was completely in love with but didn't love him back, taking the job in a daycare when he knows nothing about taking care of babies other than the things he's seen Seungsoo and Yura do. He's never been good with dealing with his own emotions, with accepting that, sometimes, something can just feel right for no reason at all — all the years he has spent in college have taught him to carefully assess a situation before making a decision, after all — but he's thirty-two and he's been forced to grow up too quickly.

Maybe he can take one last stab at being a kid and just wish for something good, hope for the best, trust that everything will be alright. That Google will take him in and that Baekhyun won't accidentally drop Soohyun when he's not paying attention to the road. That thinking of finishing kissing Baekhyun isn't the worst idea and that maybe, just maybe, Baekhyun is thinking of the same thing.

"Do I look like that kind of guy?" Kyungsoo asks, laughing a little as he pulls over.

Chanyeol removes the seat belt and turns to his side so that they're facing each other. The light from the lamp post outside casts more shadows on his features more than light, but Kyungsoo can still see the laughter in Chanyeol's eyes, the smile on the curl of the lip. "No," Chanyeol admits, then quickly blocks the jab Kyungsoo aims at him with his hands. "But you did say that you want something new, right? Why not start now? Why not start with this?"

Kyungsoo cocks his head just slightly, taking in this image of Chanyeol — not the playful one he has played a game with for so many years or the Chanyeol who wins the hearts of people, young and old, alike, with a wink, but good ol' Chanyeol, the same kid who woke up laughing on a hospital bed because, "I can't believe overtime work almost killed me!" The same person who waits for the right time to strike because he knows it's when he'll leave the greatest impact. Honest Chanyeol, the only person who has the courage to rouse Kyungsoo from his life-long sleep and tell him that, really, he has to wake up now. The sun cannot wait.

"And this is why you graduated with top honors and I was only second to you," Kyungsoo answers after a while. Chanyeol breaks out into a grin, a light cackle, and soon it's Chanyeol's laughter that they're listening to — not the silence in the car or the whirring of the engine or the static on the radio, but Chanyeol's laughter, bright and shrill and loud, that blends well with Kyungsoo's own.

☁

Soohyun gets sick again on the second week of November, on the day of Sooneung.

The streets are blessedly clear, thanks to orders from the government, and Kyungsoo is careful to not drive too fast for fear of getting reprimanded. Severance Hospital in Yonsei, he repeats in his mind in the same voice, the same tone that Baekhyun had used, and he feels a sharp pain shooting up his arm. Autumn is cruel to people who easily catch colds, young ones, babies, but the way Baekhyun said, Soohyun's wheezing. She— she looks so pale—, the way he tried to swallow every inch of panic and just focus on driving, the way he assured Kyungsoo that he was alright and that he had everything under control, made the pangs of autumn more painful than before.

Kyungsoo parks just around the block and walks to the hospital as fast as he can. Baekhyun's mask wears out over time, especially when he's faced with Soohyun. This is one of the few times he'll willingly seek help even before time runs out.

He catches Baekhyun outside the nursery, forehead pressed against the window and eyes sullen. With the little distance between them, Kyungsoo can see Baekhyun trembling, bottom lip caught between his teeth, red from worrying them too much. "Hey," he begins, soft so as to not startle Baekhyun, and Baekhyun exhales loudly when he turns around to meet Kyungsoo in the eye.

"She's safe now," Baekhyun whispers in Kyungsoo's ear as he takes Kyungsoo in his arms, face buried in the crook of Kyungsoo's neck. Kyungsoo wraps his arms around Baekhyun's waist, pulling Baekhyun closer as he runs a hand up and down Baekhyun's spine. "If I had just been quicker, if I just thought of bringing her to the hospital earlier—"

"Hey." Kyungsoo pulls away and runs his fingers along the side of Baekhyun's face, tracing its contours. He cups Baekhyun's cheek and Baekhyun sinks into the touch, closing his eyes as his shoulders slump forward. "She's alive, and that's what's important. Other fathers probably would have panicked, but you didn't. You had the presence of mind—"

"Enough to let me drive to the hospital safely, apparently." Baekhyun scoffs a little. He leans forward until their foreheads bump, and Kyungsoo immediately drops his hand to his side, a blanket of cold wrapping around his fingers at the sudden feeling of Baekhyun's warmth on his skin.

Kyungsoo clears his throat, but Baekhyun keeps his eyes closed. He slips an arm around Baekhyun's waist to steady the latter. "See? Could've been worse."

"But—" Baekhyun worries his bottom lip again. "I should've seen it coming. She wasn't this sickly when she was still under Soojung's care. Her coughs and colds went on for at least half a month! Why didn't I— There's a fucking doctor in the office building; I should have—"

Kyungsoo pinches Baekhyun in his side, and Baekhyun abruptly opens his eyes, gaze darting from the bridge of Kyungsoo's nose down to the jut of his lip. "Learned from this. All of this. At least you know what you should do if it ever happens again."

Baekhyun doesn't speak, doesn't move, doesn't make so much as the slightest action and stays in his spot, eyes focused on Kyungsoo's lips. Kyungsoo sucks his bottom lip in and slowly withdraws the hand he'd wound around Baekhyun's waist. There's too much and too little space between them and Baekhyun is just a touch, a decision away, but there's a baby to be watched just beyond the window, a duty to be fulfilled, people just around the block, getting out of the elevator.

But Baekhyun's pull is too strong and it's only seven in the morning and Kyungsoo is weak, all of his shields down, defenses dropped in favor of the warmth of Baekhyun's breath prickling his skin.

"Mr. Byun?" comes a voice few feet away, and Baekhyun pulls away just slightly to turn to the source of the voice. Kyungsoo takes a step back, the sudden loss of warmth leaving him oddly bereft. He tucks his hands in his pockets as the doctor gives his greeting, a gentle smile that reveals dimples on his cheeks.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Zhang and I'm a pediatric pulmonologist." The doctor extends his hand and Baekhyun takes it, shaking it lightly before withdrawing his hand to ease the creases of his shirt. "I will be the attending doctor of your child. Her name is Soohyun, right? Byun Soohyun?"

Baekhyun nods and clasps his hands in front of him. Kyungsoo reaches out to press down on the unruly strands of Baekhyun's hair, and Baekhyun chuckles at him before turning back to the doctor. "Yes, she's Soohyun. She was… wheezing before I took her here. She hasn't exactly been coughing. I mean there's no phlegm but—"

"There's an itchiness in her throat, yes," Dr. Zhang finishes. He gives Baekhyun a smile, then turns to Kyungsoo and gives him a curt nod. "Are you his brother, sir?"

Kyungsoo bites the inside of his cheek to keep himself from grinning. Tentatively, he parts his lips to speak. "No, I'm—"

"He's one of the fathers," Baekhyun says. He reaches for Kyungsoo's hand, grabbing Kyungsoo's wrist and pulling him close once his hand finds a nice fit, and gives Dr. Zhang a small smile. "He's been taking care of Soohyunnie a lot, too."

Dr. Zhang's eyebrows furrow a little, but there's a hint of amusement in his eyes, in the way the corners crinkle and the dimples on his cheeks get deeper, more pronounced. "Shall we take a seat, then? I'll run you through the findings of the tests we've performed on her earlier," he says, gesturing at the chairs nearby, and Kyungsoo feels the brunt force of Baekhyun's hand around his wrist, tugging him closer and pulling him along.

☁

"Jongdae says he hates and loves you, and that the key isn't under the rug."

"He still found it, anyway," Baekhyun grumbles as draws a chair closer to Soohyun's bed, lifting it so the legs don't create noise. "Remind them that they're going to a hospital and not a play place, please. You know those two can be a firecracker when put together in one room."

Kyungsoo laughs a little and closes the door behind him, slumping on the other chair Baekhyun has placed near the bed. They've only finished getting settled down a few minutes ago, and Baekhyun had requested Kyungsoo to contact both Chanyeol and Jongdae to let them know that Soohyun's condition has stabilized considerably, but that she'll need to stay in the hospital for 12 days to make sure that she'll be strong enough to face the world again. Chanyeol had been more relieved than overcome with panic, and Jongdae had explicitly said he was planning to skin Baekhyun alive when they see each other again. "I'm bringing his favorite PJs," Jongdae had mentioned before hanging up, and Kyungsoo thanked Jongdae in the softest, sweetest tone he could muster.

"And you're the fire that sets them off," Kyungsoo teases now, nudging Baekhyun in his side, and Baekhyun laughs lightly in response.

There's a wave of silence for a while, and Baekhyun leans to his side, resting his head on Kyungsoo's shoulder. Kyungsoo tenses a little when Baekhyun drums his fingers on Kyungsoo's thigh before snaking his hand under Kyungsoo's arm, bypassing defenses and resting his hand on the inner thigh. The memory of the night when Baekhyun had waged war against Chanyeol is still fresh in his mind — he can still feel the weight of Jongdae and Chanyeol's curious glances, the heat of Baekhyun's hand on his thigh, the slow and torturous way Baekhyun had slipped his hand even deeper until Kyungsoo could feel the warm press of Baekhyun's fingers through the material of his pants.

It's just the two of them here, now. Baekhyun squeezes briefly before rubbing circles on Kyungsoo's thigh, each stroke harder than the previous. Kyungsoo tilts his head, resting it on Baekhyun's own as he closes his eyes in an attempt to ease the tension in his muscles. "Feeling better now?" he asks, and Baekhyun chuckles lightly in reply.

"Bronchiolitis. Wow." Baekhyun clicks his tongue, then draws lazy figures on Kyungsoo's thigh with his thumb. It's a weird doodle that Kyungsoo can't seem to make sense of. "It's not really asthma but it's… sort of the beginning of asthma. Could be, but ah… I didn't think she'd get that from her mom."

Kyungsoo takes a deep breath and sits up straight again. He feels the light jolt of Baekhyun's body when he twists his torso a little so he can get a better look at Baekhyun. Baekhyun's eyes aren't as guarded anymore, panic no longer thick in the way he strains his eyes open, and there's a soft smile on Baekhyun's lips as he keeps his eyes on Soohyun. "You mentioned her name earlier," Kyungsoo whispers, pausing until Baekhyun turns to look at him. "Soojung, right?"

"Mhmm. That's her," Baekhyun replies. The corners of his lips tug up even more. "She was really nice. Cute, actually, but she'll kill me if she hears me say that."

Kyungsoo snorts. "I see she bites."

"She does. She bites hard," Baekhyun says, wiggling his eyebrows as he grins at Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo nudges him with his elbow, and Baekhyun yelps as he slaps Kyungsoo's thigh. "But life bit her back and she… She passed away just this Chuseok," Baekhyun finishes, voice dropping to a whisper. "She was on her way to Busan with a couple of friends, and some stupid truck driver lost control of the vehicle and… yeah. They got into a car crash."

"I'm so sorry," Kyungsoo mumbles. He reaches for Baekhyun's hand, squeezing it lightly. "I didn't know— It must have been hard."

Baekhyun sits up straight and Kyungsoo withdraws his hand abruptly, fists clenching. "It was. So much harder for Soohyun definitely. But— It's pretty hard to explain the kind of relationship we have?" Baekhyun locks his arms in front of him, stretching, before turning back to Kyungsoo. "It was just one night. Fine, a couple of drunken nights during those stressful days at work—"

Kyungsoo winces a little. "You don't have to go into the details—"

"—and we both knew, we both knew, that it would never be more than that. We both wanted different things," Baekhyun continues. He places a tentative hand on Kyungsoo's thigh, light to the touch, like he hasn't done it before. Baekhyun isn't usually unsure and uncertain of the things he does, isn't usually the type to second-guess himself, but here he is now, fingers freezing halfway through the small dance they perform when Baekhyun taps his fingers lightly on Kyungsoo's thigh. It feels weird, foreign, like Baekhyun is waiting for an answer to a question he hasn't even posed yet. "I was aware of that and she was aware of what I wanted, too. It just… It just so happened that we understood each other too well, and understood each other's bodies too well, that… yeah. Things happened."

"Things happened," Kyungsoo repeats, laughing a little. "Just like that?"

"Well… She was fun to talk to. Really smart, that woman. I could've— I could've had a future with her if I wanted to." He draws lazy patterns on Kyungsoo's thigh now — swirls, a cloud, a heart. It tickles Kyungsoo a little. "But I didn't. And she clearly could't imagine a future with me, either."

The low thrumming of the air conditioning resounds in Kyungsoo's ears, setting his racing heartbeat at ease, but he can feel the pull of hot and cold on his thigh, Baekhyun still tracing figures on the material of his pants with cold fingers, the heat of tension seeping through the cloth. "But Soohyun—" The rest of Kyungsoo's words are choked down when Baekhyun looks up at him again, bottom lip caught between his teeth, an easy smile tugging the corners of his lips up. "But Soohyun needs parents. She needs a mom and a dad—"

"And she has parents," Baekhyun finishes. "She spent eight months with Soojung. I got to visit her only twice a month because Soojung insisted to keep her away from her evil dad," Baekhyun adds, frowning when he gets to the last part. "And now that Soojung is gone, I think… I think she would be more than glad to know that there's someone helping Soohyunnie's evil dad to be a good parent." Baekhyun winks as he ends, then leans on Kyungsoo's shoulder. "She'd probably even thank you if she could."

Kyungsoo closes his eyes as he tries to even his breathing, Baekhyun's words wrapping around his chest and making it constrict, making his throat run dry. He can hear Baekhyun's words, she has parents, in his mind, can hear Soohyun calling him papa in her little voice, her tiny, shrill voice filled with so much energy and life. He remembers the way Baekhyun had looked when he first walked through the doors of XOXO and the way he looks now, as he reaches out with his free hand to caress Soohyun's cheek, remembers the way Baekhyun's eyes linger longer than they should on Kyungsoo's lips, and the way he couldn't keep his eyes away from Baekhyun's own, as well.

"Well, then, you're welcome, Soohyun's mom," Kyungsoo says all in one breath, and Baekhyun looks up at him, chuckling then giggling then erupting into light laughter. Baekhyun cranes his neck and his lips graze the the underside of Kyungsoo's jaw, and Kyungsoo can lean in now, move closer until their noses touch and their lips meet, but he can hear soft knocking on the door, Jongdae and Chanyeol's voices, faint and controlled, just beyond the wall.

"I'll get that," Kyungsoo whispers, and Baekhyun simply nods as Kyungsoo pulls away. Kyungsoo takes a deep breath before turning the knob and swallowing the huge grin that has come to surface on his lips. Jongdae and Chanyeol's greetings filter through the small opening of the door and, when Kyungsoo looks over his shoulder, he catches Baekhyun smiling — soft, tender, genuine — at him.

☁

The plan is to take turns looking over Soohyun, but Baekhyun insists to stay the whole time, leaving only for his important meetings and business pitches that he simply cannot pass on. Jongdae suggests that Baekhyun mandate his entire team to turn on their webcams so he can watch over them, but Baekhyun narrows his eyes at him as he mumbles, "That's hella creepy."

"Just for your peace of mind," Jongdae reasons out, resting a hand on Baekhyun's shoulder. "I mean, what if they take extended coffee breaks? What if they go out for lunch and come back three hours after? What if—"

"What if you go to work now and stop worrying about my team because my minions know what I'm capable of?" Baekhyun replies, a grin hanging loosely from the corners of his lips. Kyungsoo laughs from a few feet away, and he moves closer to the hospital bed, checking to see how Soohyun is doing — her eyes are fixed on Jongdae and Baekhyun, darting from one person to the other as she giggles lightly. "And they know that I can hunt them down and have briefing documents mailed to their doorsteps if I really wanted to."

"Now that's fucking creepy," Jongdae mumbles, dismissing Baekhyun with a wave of the hand. "Whatever. Your wi-fi's good, yeah? You saw the email for the upcoming pitch?"

Baekhyun's eyes widen, and Kyungsoo walks over, taking the seat beside Baekhyun. "A business pitch? For which brand?"

There's a brief exchange of looks between Jongdae and Baekhyun before Jongdae turns to him with a curt reply, saying, "Mondelez." Jongdae worries his bottom lip for a while before continuing, "Mondelez Asia Pacific, actually. The brand has been experiencing a huge decline—"

"In sales for the past three years," Kyungsoo finishes, a small smile at the corner of the lips. He's handled Mondelez before, back when he was still in Mindshare and, if there's anyone to be blamed for the decline, it would be the management's apprehension towards investing in digital media. "They rely too much on above-the-line advertising despite knowing that their market is online. Digital is the future of advertising," he continues, shaking his head a little before he adds, "I can't believe they still haven't embraced that fact."

Silence is heavy for a few seconds until Baekhyun breaks the lull with light laughter, turning to Kyungsoo as he snaps his laptop shut. "I knew you looked familiar. I can't believe I didn't realize sooner. I think I saw you in a trade event… once? A couple of times? But you were always with this, uh, tiny guy who smiles a lot."

"Media," Kyungsoo corrects. "And that would be Joonmyun. He's my boss. He used to work in Starcom before moving to Masscom."

Jongdae attacks with a slap to the arm, and Kyungsoo scowls when Jongdae lands one hit after another. "You. You! You encroached on our territory! We unwittingly let in an enemy!"

"Surprise — I'm actually not a baby sitter!" Kyungsoo says, laughing lightly.

Jongdae goes on about Kyungsoo now knowing top secret information about Starcom and potentially telling his other media friends about it — Jongdae even uses air quotes — and Baekhyun only looks at him, something akin to amusement and wonder in the way Baekhyun furrows his eyebrows a little and the way one corner of his lips tugs up even more than the other, in the way Baekhyun shakes his head, only lightly because he hasn't completely rid himself of his headache yet, in the way he purses his lips briefly, concealing the crazy grin, only to let an even brighter smile surface on his lips.

"So what are your other secrets, hmm, Do Kyungsoo?" he asks, teasing as he narrows his eyes just a little, and Kyungsoo only shakes his head and bumps their elbows together, the heat of the contact shooting up Kyungsoo's arms, forcing a smile upon his lips that he doesn't bother fighting.

☁

Kyungsoo wakes up with a dull ache in his thigh and a pool of drool on his pants. He blinks a few times, waiting for his vision to refocus, and he smiles weakly when he sees Baekhyun lying with his head on his lap, mouth slightly open and nose almost pressed to his belly. Baekhyun's laptop is on the floor, possibly on standby, and Kyungsoo looks around him for a while — nine in the morning on a Tuesday, but he already told Chanyeol yesterday that he'll just take the afternoon shift — before resolving to himself that he's not getting anything done until Baekhyun rouses from his sleep.

He cranes his neck to glance at Soohyun — she sleeps just like her father, mouth open, the rise and fall of the chest even and rhythmic, and traces of drool flaunted on her cheek.

His phone vibrates not too long after, and he strains his arm as he reaches for it, squinting at the unknown number flashing on his screen. It's not peculiar to receive a call at such an early hour, but it's been a while since he last picked up a call from anyone other than Baekhyun, Chanyeol, or Joonmyun, and, occasionally, Jongdae. He closes his eyes, taking a deep breath and clearing his throat before answering the call. He feels his elbow lock for a moment as he draws his phone closer to his ear, the word hello stumbling from his lips like a foreign greeting.

"Good morning! This is Lu Han from Google. May I please speak with Do Kyungsoo?"

Lu Han from Google— "Yes, this is Do Kyungsoo speaking," Kyungsoo replies, eyes going wide as he clenches his free hand. On his lap, Baekhyun shifts a little, nuzzling Kyungsoo's tummy, and the lurching sensation in Kyungsoo's stomach claws at the walls. "How may I help you?"

There's silence for a while and Kyungsoo worries his bottom lip a little, trying to go through what he has just said to see if he's said something wrong. All generic, nothing offensive at all, he thinks, but the white noise sends a cool sensation to the tips of his fingers, nonetheless. "We've seen your credentials and we believe that you have what it takes to be an industry strategist for all of the Asia Pacific accounts. Think of it as… being a category lead, since you came from media," Lu Han finally replies. There's light laughter for a while, and it takes a few seconds before Lu Han continues, "We're interested in experiencing your capabilities firsthand. Would you be free for a video conference within the week?"

Kyungsoo chokes down the gasp that almost escapes his lips and grins, thankful that this isn't a video conference yet. "I'm free for a video conference anytime this week, actually. Just let me know your availability," he answers, and he can tell by Lu Han's chuckle that Lu Han can hear the excitement in his voice.

"Thursday, 10 a.m.?" Lu Han asks, and Kyungsoo affirms, thanking Lu Han for the call before hanging up. He throws his head back and closes his eyes as he screams, soundless, fists clenched in an effort to not cause too much noise and wake Baekhyun and Soohyun up.

"I heard everything," comes Baekhyun's voice, though, still rough with sleep.

Kyungsoo hears the hitch in his breath as he looks down at Baekhyun. He's lying on his back now, and Kyungsoo can see every inch of his face — three pimples on Baekhyun's left cheek, one on his right, lips chapped and a tiny dot of drool near his lips. "Yeah, they called," he replies after a while, then runs a hand through Baekhyun's hair. Baekhyun is already ticklish on a normal day, but early morning makes him more vulnerable, pliant, and a bit too flushed in the cheeks. Slowly, Kyungsoo guides his hand down the length of Baekhyun's face, cupping his cheek, and pinches it a little. "I have a video con on Thursday."

"Want to run your lines by me? See if your charm still works on employers?" Baekhyun teases, and Kyungsoo pinches his nose before frowning, jutting out his bottom lip to prove a point.

The point isn't to make Baekhyun push himself off of Kyungsoo's lap or to make Baekhyun trap him against the back rest of the seat, but Baekhyun sits up, anyway, one arm holding himself up and his free hand snaking up Kyungsoo's nape, tugging on Kyungsoo's hair lightly. Kyungsoo takes in a shaky breath as Baekhyun leans close, close, closer, until their noses touch and Kyungsoo can feel the warmth of Baekhyun's breath on his lips. "It certainly works on someone," he whispers in reply, lips quirking, and he slips a hand up Baekhyun's back, under his threadbare shirt. Baekhyun whimpers in response.

"Do you, though?" Baekhyun asks, breath hitching as Kyungsoo slides his hand down to wrap around his waist. "Want to? I mean, it's okay if you don't."

Kyungsoo looks up, peering through his eyelashes, and looks Baekhyun in the eye. There's a flash of uncertainty, doubt, worry in the light furrow of his eyebrows, in the way his fingers turn cold against Kyungsoo's skin, and Kyungsoo feels his insides turn again. He licks his lips and Baekhyun's gaze immediately follows the movement, and Kyungsoo takes one deep breath before leaning closer, their lips meeting in a light brush. He thinks of change, of leaving the past behind, of taking that leap of faith and taking Baekhyun with him. "I want you," he confesses, and there it is — the light tremble of Baekhyun's lips against his own, the warm contact of skin on skin, the inelegant slide of their mouths as Baekhyun parts his lips just slightly, granting Kyungsoo access. Kyungsoo licks Baekhyun's teeth, the roof of his mouth, and he feels the vibrations on his skin when Baekhyun moans. Baekhyun sucks on his tongue in retaliation, sucks on the corners of his mouth, and Kyungsoo yields in favor of Baekhyun nipping on his lower lip, of Baekhyun laving his tongue on the bruised area, opening up for Kyungsoo to claim his mouth one last time as he catches Baekhyun's upper lip between his teeth.

"You could've—" Baekhyun chokes midway through his sentence when Kyungsoo licks a stripe along the column on his neck, then sucks at the base. "—just said yes, you know. Flashy."

Kyungsoo pulls away, holding Baekhyun at an arm's length, and he swallows before pressing forward and kissing the tip of Baekhyun's nose. "Had to make sure you got the message," he whispers, and Baekhyun erupts into a lovely peal of laughter. The vibrations tickle Kyungsoo's skin.

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